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No Stupid Questions

The old phrase “there is no such thing as a stupid question” applies to weddings just as much as any other part of life. Sometimes it is easy for us to forget you will only do one wedding where as we at Colstoun have done hundreds over the years. So we know the answers to many questions you might think are too stupid to ask.

I want to write a series of little articles just like this that will help you through those planning conundrum! as we move forward in a world post covid the expectations and realities of what you can do at your wedding have definitely changed.

If you are a wedding expert these might be really boring articles for you. But if this is your first and only time you will hopefully get some benefit.


1) how many people should we invite?

how long is a piece of string? This is a question as old as time. When two of my best friends got married the bride’s mum wrote a list of over 500 people, needless to say the number they went with was closer to 150… still a big wedding by today’s standards but much smaller than the first figure. We see that most people who want to get married at Colstoun have between 80-120 people even though we host up to 160. an Important thing to remember for your big day is even with 100 people and a 2 minute per guest chat you are looking at over 3 hours of hello, hugs and kisses which can be exhausting. By taking advantage of a full weekend wedding you can have dinner with up to 40-ish guests the night before significantly reducing the amount of time you spend saying hello on your big day! The final answer is up to you. COVID taught us that it’s definitely possible to have weddings with 10 or so people. Legally you only need 5, you two, two witnesses and the officiant. Don’t be afraid to do what is correct for you… After all it is your big day!

2) Do we have to have cake?

The long answer is traditionally people expect to have cake at a wedding. However, things are beginning to change, over the last five years we have seen many people have cheesecakes… Not the American style of dessert but "cake" made of tiers of different wheels of cheese. Many people also choose to have no dessert and just serve people slices of the wedding cake. Many people used to have royal icing on the cake and keep the top tier for the christening of their first born child, as royal icing has become less popular over time this tradition has also faded… Something that cake makers will hate me for saying is you probably don’t need really big a cake. By the time that it comes round to eating cake at the end of the night many people are so full after canapés and a full three course meal that they won’t eat cake necessarily that evening. This is just a personal opinion however, it maybe comes from the fact that I am not a big cake eater… But highlights again that your wedding is what you want it to be not what anyone else says it should be (obviously within the rules laid out by the venue that you choose)

3) Should we have a BBQ on the Sunday after the wedding?

Just like having a meal on the Friday night can reduce the need to race round hundreds of people all at once to ensure that you get to say hello to everyone… Having a barbecue on the Sunday is another way of Spreading out the festivities and having more time with the people that you love. At Colstoun our standard venue hire finishes at 12pm on Sunday, but it is possible to extend the hire if we don’t have another event planned and for an additional fee.

4) Do I have to get married in a church?

Nope! Especially if you aren’t religious. We would say that the vast majority of people who use Colstoun for their wedding don’t get married in a church, of the approximately 95% of people who don't get married in a church the choice is endless. In Scotland you can get married inside or outside or anywhere you want as long as your celebrant agrees! Many couples choose our Polytunnel, or the West Lawn, but we've mown areas in sheep fields and even had a couple get married in a clearing in the woods!

,5) Do we have to have confetti?

No, confetti isn’t for everyone we understand this! However, if you do choose to have confetti it is important that it is natural confetti. We at Colstoun are only particular about a few things and confetti is one of them. Biodegradable confetti is not the same as natural and as such we can’t have it in the grounds. Nor can we have any natural confetti that might contain seeds. We have a difficult balance in that we are organic in the gardens and grounds so any seeds of outside varieties could cause huge issues! If you are in doubt about what sort of confetti you can have but want to enjoy it please ask Lyn (mum) and she’ll direct you to the right stuff… or more likely try to hard sell you on her own hand made Colstoun confetti!

I hope I’ve answered a question or two you might have about the world of weddings . If you want a particular question answered please write it in the comments on the blog or social media.

look forward to answering some more of your questions soon.



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